Kid’s Birthday Parties

March 13, 2008 at 2:15 am Leave a comment


Sam Di Brito writes the All Men Are Liars column for the Sydney Morning Herald. Here’s a great piece he wrote recently concerning the dread of parents everywhere – the birthday party. His reader’s comments are enlightening at times also.

Once partnership has beckoned and fatherhood headlocks a man to the floor of responsibility, a bloke is forced to confront one of life’s more complex joys – the children’s birthday party.

They’re an occasion where the screaming of one’s own kiddie-winks seems subsonic compared to the thunder clap of two dozen little people pinging on soft-drink, when the kinder sturmtruppen that besieges your fridge after-school appears as polite as a Neville Chamberlain handshake when measured against the midget hoard eviscerating party pies and sausage sandwiches in your backyard.

It’s also a time for you to rub manboobs with a dozen or so parents whom you have absolutely nothing in common save a primary school or soccer team – men and women you’d run off the road with single digit enthusiasm if you encountered their beetle-brows on a holiday congested freeway.

For the single, childless man, however, these occasions serve both as aphrodisiac and prophylactic, for while there will undoubtedly be a couple of yummy mummies on hand to make things frisky, their bleating progeny flash like lights at a death-trap level crossing …

It seems an eon ago when a dunking bucket of apples and a drunkenly sketched donkey looking for its’ tail was enough to occupy a group of seven-year-old children.

Read the whole article here.


Entry filed under: Helpful Info.

Childhood Fears Pants In A Pinch

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